This cretin tried to hit on me at Pops while his SO was in the bathroom and refused to back off despite my repeatedly telling him to do so.

~Submitted by: Ninyabruja

If You Live in Chicago, You've Seen this Guy

There is a homophobic preacher who stands outside the Old Navy on State Street. He shouts into his microphone about the horrors of gays, and I can hear it from my apartment - it causes me terrible anxiety. I have asked him several times to stop, I tried to have a dialogue with him about it... I even screamed at him, and he refuses to stop. Please make him go away.

~Submitted by Howard Brown

Next time I see him, I am going to report him.

Happened 3 times now- yesterday, March 14, 2012 was the most recent.

There's a guy who takes the 147 headed North during the morning rush. He's about 30-ish, about 5'8", medium build, medium length dark brown hair (slicked down), always wears sunglasses (large mirrored ones), appears to be Latino. He has a very trimmed facial hair - basically a chin strap. He usually gets on the bus at Pearson and Michigan and gets off at Foster/Marine.

On several occasions I've seen him rub against women standing near the front of the bus. This happened to me about three weeks ago, and I can't stand seeing this guy do it to other people. He stands against a woman at the front of the bus even if there is space to not stand so close and presses his crotch against the woman's body. He becomes visibly aroused doing this, and continues until he gets off. Next time I see him, I am going to report him.

If you are surrounded by people, SPEAK UP.

I have just spent several hours reading the holla back experiences posted by people in DC and Chicago. I did not respond to any of them individually because the postings were rather old, and I would have been typing for hours and repeating myself. I have noticed a pattern. The pattern seems to be ignoring, walking away, or simply taking it, which to me is actually accepting the behavior. I know from experience that it’s hard to think of what to say or do at the actual moment of harassment. Been there - haven’t done anything, either. And cell phone photography is difficult at best, not very fast and oftentimes not possible. But if you’re on a crowded bus or train, it seems to me that a very loud Stop Touching Me would be appropriate. Stare down your attacker. Report the incident to the bus driver AND the transportation authority. Further, an “accidental” yet well-placed elbow (oh, so sorry, this ride is SO bumpy/this train is SO crowded) to the chest or face or groin area (depending on your location, seated/standing) is in order. STOP TAKING IT. Don’t ignore it. If you are surrounded by people, SPEAK UP.

--Lorraine

Comfortable Girl (Check it out!)

I get harassed a lot on the street, which pisses me off. I have an illustrated blog called "The Comfortable Girl" and sometimes I illustrate my adventures in street harassment.

Here's one based on an incident that happened yesterday at the mail box at the corner of North and Leavitt.

http://comfortablegirl.blogspot.com/2011/08/guys-are-still-creepy-to-girls-who-wear.html

--LM

I Just Kept on Staring

I was crossing the street at Ashland and Hubbard and this dude was stuck in gridlocked traffic, windows down, just staring at me. I could feel his eyes on me- watching me cross the street and wait for the bus. I first tried to ignore him, but then I felt myself getting angry- it was like I was letting him control me, and it made me feel frustrated. So I took a breath, looked up, and just stared his ass down. I even moved my feet apart a little to take up more space on the sidewalk. Just stared him full in the face, and tried to give him a look that said I was in control and didn't feel like having him stare at me. He was surprised and he looked away in discomfort. He checked his phone. I just kept on staring. When traffic picked up, he looked up at me again- and I was still staring at him with my intense, no-nonsense, don't-fuck-with-this face. It felt awesome. I think more people should try it. It's kind of like turning the tables. It let the dude know that I didn't appreciate what he was doing, and gave him a taste of his own medicine.

--Arline

How do you Explain Sexism to Children?

A reader recently e-mailed me to ask for advice or resources. I'd love to help her out so please let me know if you have any recommendations!

"I was wondering if you know of any resources that specifically deal with the issue of explaining sexism and street harassment to kids. I have a friend who is always really trapped between A) wanting to say something but not wanting to 1) use harsh language in front of her daughter, 2) not want to put her daughter in danger by saying something/ teaching her to say something and B) not wanting to teach her daughter that it's okay for men to say things to her or her mom on the street. Yeah, I just thought I'd give it a shot to see if you've ever stumbled across anything."

-Jean

It Wasn't My Fault

I was walking to the gas station today to get some dish washing liquid. A group of 5 young boys walked by and one of them said "hey shawty what's your name?"

Of course being the person I am I ignored him 1. Because he was ugly and 2. He was young as hell like 15 or 16. Anyway after I ignored his comment he struck back by saying "Damn! You don't know how to speak!" and he kept walking I thought that it was over after that but I was wrong.

When I walked out the gas station the group of boys were not too far down the street they were like 2 blocks away so I knew if I walked by again something bad probably would've happened so I went to the opposite side of the street and once I walked past here came the harsh comments: "You ugly slut!" "You bitch!" "You hoe bet u suck dick!" "You ugly as fuck" etc.

These comments ensued until I was one block away from them. Pissed and frustrated at me thinking before acting I didn't say anything back to them because I figured that it would turn into something worse than just a few harsh words. I ran in the house trying to find a weapon and get some male friends to basically...well kill all them.

I was calmed down by my family members though before stuff started to escalate I regret not standing up for myself...but yet I feel that it wasn't my fault that they got so angry with me. Also, mind you, my hair was messed up, I had on a gray hoodie so nothing was exposed, and some dirty pants...he was fucking desperate if he was trying to holla at me!

~Submitted by Tiffany C.

You still win. You made him run.

I like to write. And though I'll eventually write something more polished about what happened to me this weekend, I want to get it down now in case this creep is still lurking.

On Friday, April 15, I took the day off and took myself to a movie. I couldn't remember the last time I'd been to the movies alone and it just sounded good. I love solitude, but I rarely seek it outside my own home. Now I remember why.

I was about an hour into "Source Code" when a man came up into my row and sat two seats to my left. My heart immediately started thumping. I'm not usually immediately intimidated by unknown men but my body knew something was up. He had not been sitting in the theater earlier (there were only about 10 of us in there) and I was the only lone female. As I tried to relax and focus on the movie, I caught the telltale signs of what my body had already predicted. I heard him unzip his pants, saw him pull his jacket into his lap, and heard the rhythmic brushing of his hand against the material of his jacket. I started to think about the kind of person I am - the kind of person I've always been. I'm quiet, keep to myself, and never call people out in public. I know - have always known - that I'm the exact kind of woman these guys look for. I'm polite. I'd decided I didn't care what this guy, or anyone in the theater, thought of me. I reached into my purse and got my phone. The man stopped moving his hands and brought them out from under his jacket, folding them in his lap and pretending to watch the movie. I knew this wouldn't be the end of it, and I'd already missed crucial plot points, so I turned my phone on and got ready to take his picture. He zipped up, but only partially, and ran. He was holding onto his pants with one hand while he ran out. I sat for a moment, and then ran after him, leaving my coat and purse in the theater. I chased him into a theater across the hall, and this is where I made my mistake: I went down the hall to get security. Had I stayed there, someone would have come along eventually, and he'd have been trapped in there, easy for me to identify. But when I came back with security, it was clear he'd either made his way into another theater or slipped out the back exit. I sat in the lobby of the theater for the next hour, praying to see him walk out. I was going to follow him down the sidewalk with my cameraphone on the video setting.

But I never saw him. Still angry, I called the cops to give a description. He was older - late 50's or early 60's, white, heavy-set, balding but with some greyish / white hair, glasses, a grey/beige sweatshirt and jeans. One of the officers asked if the man appeared to be mentally impaired, and I was humbled a bit. There are truly sick people out there - people we should be helping - and it's possible this man is one of them. But I can still be angry if that's the case, because men who are that ill should NOT be left in theaters unattended. What if this was summer and he'd done that to a young girl? Since I can't know whether or not he's clinically ill, I can only do what is well within my right, and say something - make him aware that his behavior is wrong and hurtful. I was still kicking myself for not getting his picture when my best friend said, "You still win. You made him run."

~Submitted by Kelly K